High Heels? Don't You Mean 'Why Heels'
Did you know high heels were originally invented for men? I know right. The most impractical, uncomfortable, and restrictive shoes were designed for and worn by the 'stronger sex'. In fact, contrary to the popular opinion that Europe (specifically Paris) is fashion-central, heels were brought to Europe from Persia by emissaries of the Shāh Abbās I in the early 1600s. They actually used to serve a practical purpose. #shocker
Historically, the Persian cavalry wore heeled shoes so that their feet fit into their stirrups better. After all, nobody likes falling off a horse going full gallop mid-battle.
In fact, high heeled shoes have been dated as far back as 3500 B.C. when Egyptian butchers wore them to walk over the floors of their shops inevitably covered in the blood and guts of the carved up animals. And these butchers were all - you guessed it - men. (I know I know.. total badassery!!)
(More on the history and development of high heels - http://history-of-heels.weebly.com/origins-of-high-heels.html)
With that in mind:
How in the world did these death trap, ankle-rolling worthy, blister-causing, skeletal reforming hell-shoes become a fashion statement, and, ultimately, the epitome of femininity and female formal wear???
Modern feminists and female comedians (I highly suggest Iliza Schlesinger) point out and make jokes about how heels prevent women from running away from potential attackers. And, unfortunately, this is very true. Most notably, China saucer high heels were worn by concubines during the Qing Dynasty in China to stop them from fleeing the harem. A form of mobile shackling. Sounds a little rapey if you ask me.
PERSONAL STORY ALERT!!!
A few months ago I was in London celebrating a friend's birthday, and naturally, the dress code was 'black tie'. So, of course, I wore heels and a dress. I had ordered the atrocities from Amazon the day before (no time to 'break in' the shoes) and they were higher and narrower than I was expecting. (Disclosure: I don't frequently dress formally, so a dress alone is enough to make me uncomfortable, let alone my minimal experience walking in stilettos.)
Now, every woman who's been on a night out in uncomfortable heels knows what's going to happen. It's a reality we all have to face, that I've face too many times, and at the end of the night I swear up and down that I'm going home to set fire to all my heels and maybe my bras, too (because, why not, while we're on a roll here).
Generally, the night starts out okay. You feel the tightness in the toe area, or the rubbing against the back of your ankle, but it's bearable for the time being. You sit down for a meal or a drink and there's relief for an hour or so. But then you stand up to go to the bathroom and - oh no - your feet got used to having blood circulating through them again, and now the ache is distressing. But you #GirlUp (awesome book, btw!) and soldier on. You somehow manage to totter through the streets, up and down stairs and make it through several hours of 'dancing' (if you can even call 'step together, step together' with an expression of agony plastered across your face dancing) and now it is FINALLY time to go home.
thank god
But, wait. As you leave the club and try to flag down your Uber driver huddled like penguins on the pavement, you can't take it anymore. F*ck it. Aaaaaand off come the heels, out come the toes, and NOW you feel throbbing pain as your skeleton readjusts to flat ground and the blood returns to your feet. Your toes are slightly curled, not unlike the start of Chinese foot binding (dear god why was that a thing) and the blisters on your ankles will probably double in size before the sun comes up. But, hey, at least you looked tall in all the pictures, right?
The glorious thing about being a woman these days is that we have license to wear what we want. So, wear heels if you want to, don't wear them if you don't want to. It's as simple as that. And hats off to all those of you who can walk/dance/run comfortably in 6" stilettos.
Historically, the Persian cavalry wore heeled shoes so that their feet fit into their stirrups better. After all, nobody likes falling off a horse going full gallop mid-battle.
In fact, high heeled shoes have been dated as far back as 3500 B.C. when Egyptian butchers wore them to walk over the floors of their shops inevitably covered in the blood and guts of the carved up animals. And these butchers were all - you guessed it - men. (I know I know.. total badassery!!)
(More on the history and development of high heels - http://history-of-heels.weebly.com/origins-of-high-heels.html)
With that in mind:
How in the world did these death trap, ankle-rolling worthy, blister-causing, skeletal reforming hell-shoes become a fashion statement, and, ultimately, the epitome of femininity and female formal wear???
Modern feminists and female comedians (I highly suggest Iliza Schlesinger) point out and make jokes about how heels prevent women from running away from potential attackers. And, unfortunately, this is very true. Most notably, China saucer high heels were worn by concubines during the Qing Dynasty in China to stop them from fleeing the harem. A form of mobile shackling. Sounds a little rapey if you ask me.
PERSONAL STORY ALERT!!!
A few months ago I was in London celebrating a friend's birthday, and naturally, the dress code was 'black tie'. So, of course, I wore heels and a dress. I had ordered the atrocities from Amazon the day before (no time to 'break in' the shoes) and they were higher and narrower than I was expecting. (Disclosure: I don't frequently dress formally, so a dress alone is enough to make me uncomfortable, let alone my minimal experience walking in stilettos.)
Now, every woman who's been on a night out in uncomfortable heels knows what's going to happen. It's a reality we all have to face, that I've face too many times, and at the end of the night I swear up and down that I'm going home to set fire to all my heels and maybe my bras, too (because, why not, while we're on a roll here).
Generally, the night starts out okay. You feel the tightness in the toe area, or the rubbing against the back of your ankle, but it's bearable for the time being. You sit down for a meal or a drink and there's relief for an hour or so. But then you stand up to go to the bathroom and - oh no - your feet got used to having blood circulating through them again, and now the ache is distressing. But you #GirlUp (awesome book, btw!) and soldier on. You somehow manage to totter through the streets, up and down stairs and make it through several hours of 'dancing' (if you can even call 'step together, step together' with an expression of agony plastered across your face dancing) and now it is FINALLY time to go home.
thank god
But, wait. As you leave the club and try to flag down your Uber driver huddled like penguins on the pavement, you can't take it anymore.
***
Despite all this ranting and raving about how awful heels are, not only for our physical well being, but also for the status of women in this patriarchal world... I still have several pairs at home that I actually really love. What can I say? *shrug* I like that they make me taller and force me to have better posture.The glorious thing about being a woman these days is that we have license to wear what we want. So, wear heels if you want to, don't wear them if you don't want to. It's as simple as that. And hats off to all those of you who can walk/dance/run comfortably in 6" stilettos.
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